Episode 126: Welcome to another installment of Real Health Radio. This week I’m sitting down one of my past clients, Rachel, to talk about what it’s been like working together.
We cover why she came to see me, what we’ve worked on and where she is now at with their health, body image, and relationship with food.
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Chris Sandel: Welcome to Episode 126 of Real Health Radio. You can find the links talked about as part of this episode at the show notes, which is www.seven-health.com/126.
Welcome to Real Health Radio: Health advice that’s more than just about how you look. Here’s your host, Chris Sandel.
Hey, guys. Thanks for joining me for another episode. This is an episode where it’s not a solo show, I’m not interviewing some expert, but instead, you’re going to be hearing from a past client of mine called Rachel.
This episode coming together was rather serendipitous. Last week, out of the blue, I received an email from Rachel. I’d worked with her during the latter part of last year and the very beginning of this year, and she emailed to say that it had been 6 months since we finished up working together and wanted to update me on everything that had happened since then. I’d been so happy with what Rachel had achieved while we were working together, but it was just really lovely to hear how these improvements had continued on and how they had permeated out, positively affecting all areas of her life.
I know it’s cliché to say, but it really made my day. I think I’d had a pretty crappy night’s sleep because of Ramsay and was just having a bit of a struggle of a day, and then to receive an email like that, it really did lift me. I let Rachel know how happy I was to hear from her and how well she was doing, and asked her if she’d be up for having a conversation together for the podcast. She said she’d be honored, and so here we are.
I’ve done episodes like this before, which I’ll link to in the show notes, but it’s normally two past clients in one show. But this time I decided to go into more detail with Rachel and have her share more of her experience. What I really like about this conversation is that Rachel touches on so many issues that my clients deal with. They won’t necessarily deal with all of them, but Rachel really flags a large chunk of the kinds of fears and concerns that clients have when they start out, as well as the changes that they notice and experience as they go through the process.
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Another reason why I’m releasing this episode now is because I’m taking on clients again. Client work is the core of my business and it’s how I spend the vast majority of my time, and after working with clients for the last decade, I feel confident in saying I’m very good at what I do, and hopefully Rachel can be a testament to this, as you’ll hear.
She demonstrates why these struggles aren’t just a collection of symptoms, but are instead part of someone’s identity and impacting on all areas of their life; that it’s not just about food and understanding the science of physiology, but also about compassion and how the more intangible thoughts and feelings and beliefs need to be addressed as well; and that changes actually add to the quality of life – yes, it can be hard to start with, as change invariably is, but these new habits and ways of doing things are enjoyable; that every day isn’t misery, convincing yourself that it’s going to be better for your long-term health; that you get to appreciate and experience the improvements in your physical health and your mental health and your emotional health now.
After working together, my clients regain what they thought was impossible. In Rachel’s case, it was regaining her period, overcoming digestive issues so that she can now eat anything, changing her relationship with exercise, being content and having belief in herself, having high energy and being able to write and think and focus for her PhD, and becoming accepting of her body and working with what it’s good at and embracing its strengths.
I put out so much free material. The podcast is free, the blog posts are free. While all the free material I put out, I stand behind, it is much more general. You have to discern what is and isn’t relevant for you. But when I work with someone, I’m the one who can sort through this and show them what’s important and what is the low-hanging fruit, and what are the leaves that’ll make the most difference – which, again, you’ll hopefully hear in Rachel’s account.
If you want this kind of precision in helping you recover your health, now is your chance to work with me. If you’re interested in working together or simply finding out more, you can head over to www.seven-health.com/help. There you can read about how I work with clients and apply for a free initial chat.
With this intro out of the way, let’s get on with today’s show. Here is my conversation with my past client, Rachel.
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Hey, Rachel. Thank you for chatting with me today.
Rachel: Hey, Chris. How’s it going?
Chris Sandel: I’m good. I guess to start with, do you want to explain a little about your background and why you first got in contact with me?
Rachel: Yep. It’s a bit of a long history, but essentially I was struggling on and off with anorexia since I was about 16 or 17. I got to a point where I got really sick when I was about 25, but then after that, I went through recovery, as everyone does, and I got to a point where I was recovered enough that I didn’t need medical attention, but I was in a place where I wasn’t eating like an adult, I guess. I was still hovering on low-ish calories.
I was really struggling with this in my head, and I was really tired. I felt like I was at a point where I wanted to really be done with my eating disorder, because I don’t think I’d fully gotten over it in the psychological sense and the behavioral sense. Yeah, I reached a point where I just really, really wanted to be done with it.
A number of times I tried to do that on my own. As much as I am a determined person, it was something that I couldn’t do. Every time I tried to do it, I would say, “Okay, tomorrow I’m going to eat normally and everything,” and then I would feel like crap and I would really feel guilty about eating so much, ad then it would just go into this vicious cycle and I would be back at square one.
I then started to look into the option of getting someone else on board to help me, and then that’s when I came across your site, I think.
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Chris Sandel: You said you tried to do it on your own, and then you started looking at other options. Had you worked with other people throughout the years? You mentioned about having anorexia and getting treatment there, but after that point had there been any other practitioners you’d worked with?
Rachel: Yeah. I think predominantly before I had worked mainly with a psychotherapist, so not really into the eating itself and the behavioral stuff itself. Which really, really helped the emotional part and really helped me deal with a lot of the reasons why I was suffering with anorexia.
And then just before I worked with you, I did work with a nutritional therapist very, very briefly, but it didn’t really work out.
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Chris Sandel: Was there hesitancy in contacting me? How long were you thinking about it?
Rachel: Yeah, I was thinking about this today, actually, and I think I reached out to you, or I maybe looked into it a few months before I actually decided to go for it. I thought about it and I looked at it and said, “Okay, I’m going to do this,” and then I talked myself out of it again. So I waited another few months, I think. I tried to do it myself again and then really got to that point of “I really need help with this.”
So then, like everything I do, I read everything, I looked at all the testimonials, I looked at what’s the approach, how does this work, everything like that. And then after speaking with you, I realized that it would be a good fit, because that’s really important for me as well. So then I think I took it from there. But yeah, I think I remember going in and out of like “I’ll just do it.” Even when you first responded to me, I think I delayed the response a little bit. [laughs]
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Chris Sandel: What was the process like of working together? Can you describe that for other people, what the experience looked like and also felt like?
Rachel: Honestly, when I first started, like I said, I was really motivated. “I’m going to do anything.” I’m one of those people who if someone tells me to do something, I’m pretty good at following things. I’m pretty respectful of that thing when other people provide you with help and stuff.
But I remember initially – I think the thing is you were telling me what I knew I needed to hear, but I didn’t really want to hear it. [laughs] It’s that thing where you’re mentally ready for change, but when it actually comes to doing it, it’s a very different story. I remember after the initial part, I started to feel better because we addressed a lot of the stuff that I was having problems with, my digestion as well, and we addressed some of that, so I started to feel a bit better. And then you were like, “How about you try having some breakfast?” I was like – anxiety just hit the roof. [laughs] I was like, “Oh my God, I can’t have breakfast. I can’t eat anything that early in the morning.”
So in the process, I went in and out of this – when it came to having our catch-up, I would feel like, “I know this is good for me, but I’m so – I don’t know if I want to do this.” [laughs] During our conversations, I remember thinking to myself, “I know he’s right, I know he’s right, but maybe I just won’t do it. Maybe I’ll just pretend.” [laughs] But I would say that was more in the early stages.
Then as things started to go on, when I started to eat better, my mood started to shift as well, and as my mood started to shift, I think I started to be much more on board with the process. I was much more convinced, I suppose, that it was the right thing to do and what you were telling me was the right thing to do.
But I think as anyone knows, anything that involves behavioral change, especially behaviors that we’re talking over a decade here, anything that involves that kind of behavioral change is ultimately going to be a struggle.
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Chris Sandel: So then tell me what improvements you’ve noticed in your health since we worked together.
Rachel: I think this is probably a big one for me. When I first came to you, I was really tired all the time and I had the worst digestion. I was struggling to digest certain things. I convinced myself that I was going to eat more carb and high fat. I think the thing is as well, we were trying to get my period back, and I had read all this stuff that high fat diet, it’s hard to get your period back and everything.
Now, when I think about that, I can’t believe that that’s where I was. But yeah, I had a lot of issues with fatigue and digestion, and my period was missing and all of that. I was also not eating a lot, but still putting on weight and just feeling really crappy about myself.
And now, honestly, it’s like a new person. The massive thing, obviously, was when my period came back. It came back in December, and I think that was probably the biggest turning point for me. Even in how much better my moods are. You’ll know, when we first started working together – but now I’m so much more content.
I think we talked about this, but I noticed that I just laugh very freely. [laughs] It’s really hard to explain, but I’ll just be chatting with my friends, and I think before, especially when I wasn’t feeling so good, I’d be – not numb to my emotions, but I would be just a bit flat. And now I just burst into this complete hilarity. [laughs] It comes out of nowhere, and it’s like a deep belly laugh. To me, that’s the biggest shift mentally. Everything just feels lighter, it feels easier. The way I can approach life is easier because I feel like I have the energy, I have the resilience. I have all of that.
Also, the other big one, I think, was my digestion. I think at the time, I was a little bit trying to avoid eating more carbs, but also, every time you were like “Try this, try that,” I was like, “But sweet potatoes aren’t working for me.” I guess because I was pretty low carb, anything I ate that had a little bit of fiber or whatever it was, the types of sugars and stuff, it was just not digesting well at all. I really struggled with that, because that was a daily thing.
And now, my digestion is on fire. [laughs] It’s just amazing. I feel like a machine now. And I am absolutely knocking back the carbs. [laughs] So yeah, that was a really nice thing that my body shifted and adapted.
It was a really nice experience to see also that your body really knows what you need. If you just listen to it and you just give it enough and give it good stuff, then it will figure it out.
The other thing that was a big issue was really over-exercising before as well. That’s changed quite a lot. I still exercise now, and I think we’ll talk about that a bit later.
Chris Sandel: Yeah.
Rachel: But now, it’s not – I think before it was like an equation for me. It was like, “Okay, I splurged on this or I binged – not binged, but I ate something maybe sugary or something I wouldn’t normally have, so I’ll do a bit of extra exercise tomorrow.” It’s totally not like that anymore. It’s much more because I’ve got the energy to do it. It’s because it gives me pleasure. It’s because it’s a goal-oriented thing. It’s about how it makes me feel as a woman, as a human, all of those things.
So yeah, massive, massive shift in that sense. I really just enjoy it now. I love it. So I think those are the biggest changes in my health.
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Chris Sandel: I’d like to chat about some of those in a bit more detail. You said you got your period back, and that was in December time. Roughly how long had we been working together by that stage?
Rachel: I think it might’ve been around 6 or 7 months. Is that right? I’m not sure.
Chris Sandel: My recollection would be shorter than that. I’m thinking it was probably around the July or August time that we started.
Rachel: Okay, so maybe around – from the summer, then. So 4 months or something like that, roughly.
Chris Sandel: Then since it started, has it been up and down? Has it been like clockwork? What’s happened? What’s it been like?
Rachel: Pretty much – the cycle length itself hasn’t always been the same, but pretty much every month since December, I’ve had a period. It’s been really healthy, and what I mean by that is it flows pretty freely, and then I don’t have any major cramps, I don’t have any major issues with it. I get all of the symptoms leading up to it, so I know exactly when it’s going to come, and then it turns up. Normally my cycle is around the 28 to 32-day mark, so it varies, but it’s pretty spot-on every month.
It makes me really happy when it arrives. [laughs] That’s the only way I can explain it. But yeah, since then I’ve really had no problems with it at all.
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Chris Sandel: What about the food side of things? How has your eating changed, how has your thoughts around food changed?
Rachel: It would be very much the center of what I did. I would be constantly thinking about – I think a lot of it was in my head that I was trying to fix my amenorrhea. I was trying to find a way to get my period back. I think before, it was really such a – it took so much of my time.
And now it’s really more about fuel. It’s really more about, “Well, I need this to do what I want to do, and I enjoy eating these things,” and it’s less of – God, I used to spend so much time planning and thinking about which foods and everything. Now, it’s just “I feel like having some sweet potato and peanut butter tonight, and I’m just going to do it.” [laughs] It’s much more relaxed.
I can go to a friend’s and they can cook me a meal and it’s not a source of anxiety. I’m not trying to control it. I’m not trying to mitigate what I eat before or what I eat the next day, depending upon what they cook me. I’m more just enjoying the experience of that. Like on Friday night, I went to a friend’s, and I generally don’t eat a lot of pasta just because it’s not something I like, but he made some pasta and I was like, “Okay, we’ll just go with it.” It’s just not the center anymore.
In terms of how my eating has changed, I am very much a carb lover now. [laughs] I just eat so much now. It’s the way that I guess a lot of people are. Some days I’m not too hungry; other days I’m ravenous, so I’m just going to go with that. Whereas before, I would’ve been hungry, but I would’ve just been like, “No, this is all I’m supposed to have today, so I’m going to do this.” I used to be scared of my hunger as well. I used to be like, “What happens if I eat more?” and that kind of thing, whereas now it’s no big deal.
Honestly, I think that the increase in carbs thing is the biggest thing for me, because I was never convinced that was going to be good for me. And I’m not saying – it’s a very individual thing, but I’ve actually found out that I do better with a lot more carbs. Which was quite a surprise.
And I still eat well. I always have liked my vegetables. Since I was a kid, I always have liked to eat like that. But still, if I want to have a cookie, a piece of cake, whatever it is, I’m going to do it, and it’s okay, and the next day I move on and life goes on.
Sweet things, I used to ruminate on it, and I remember I used to spend hours and hours trying to – for example, when I went to my friend’s for the pasta, I would’ve come home and tried to figure out the portion size and how many calories that was, and how can I track that because I don’t know what was in it. Now I just accept that it’s part of life, it’s part of socializing. It’s not so important.
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Chris Sandel: What about the exercise front? That obviously changed a lot, so describe that.
Rachel: I think before, like I said, it was very much an equation thing, and almost sometimes, I guess, resembled punishment in a way. If I ate something that I wasn’t comfortable with, it was like a purging. It was trying to get rid of – I think basically, if it was sugary things, something happened in my brain where I would almost physically feel it around my stomach. I would feel it, and the only way that I could get rid of that feeling was to go exercise really, really hard, when there was no way that – like I said, it wasn’t even like I was binging. I was just eating like a thing that wasn’t what I deemed to be okay. It was an equation.
Now, it’s changed quite drastically, actually. At the start of this year – well, towards the end of last year I started to get into lifting weights and stuff like that, and I was doing a bit of calisthenics. I was getting quite good at handstands, and then I was getting quite good at deadlift, and my numbers were pretty good. I was getting really strong. Then I started to think about it, and I really started seriously training for powerlifting at the beginning of the year.
When I started lifting, I realized that actually I could get really strong. I realized that actually, I was never built to be skinny. Like, never built to be – I come from a very athletic family, and my granny always used to say I was born with legs like a centaur half, you know. [laughs] Which, when you’re a wee girl, you don’t really want to hear those kind of things. [laughs] But yeah, just very well-built and strong bone structure and everything.
I realized when I started lifting, my body adapted really well to that, and so I enlisted a coach to help with that. I’ve seriously been training for powerlifting since the start of the year, like I said. It’s a completely different approach. Potentially, I am quite obsessed about it, but I guess in a bit more of a healthier way in the sense that I’m trying to learn about the technical aspects. I’m trying to learn about competitions and what the process is and how to improve.
The focus is very much more on lifting with good form and getting the technique right. Yeah, it’s about obviously improving your lifts, but it’s about being a good powerlifter and it’s about taking care of my body while doing it and making sure I’m doing all the other stuff to support that as well.
I train hard for my sport, but – actually, I’ve got a competition coming up in October, which at the time I thought was only a local competition, but it turns out it’s the national championships. [laughs] I didn’t realize – normally you have to qualify to take part in the nationals, but here, because it’s not a massive sport, there’s not enough numbers to have those district meets. So they just go straight for the big competition. So yeah, I’m competing in the nationals. But it’s going to be a good experience.
I’m also doing all the other stuff to support that, so I’m training hard, but I’m also getting really good quality sleep. Actually, that’s one thing that really improved since we worked together. I can sleep for 9 or 10 hours a night now, solidly, which is amazing, because I used to sleep like 6 or 7.
So I look after my body now. I do all the recovery stuff, and I make sure that – the thing is, with powerlifting, if you’re not fueling yourself, you’re just not going anywhere. You’re never going to build the muscle, you’re never going to build the strength to do it. Food is like a tool now. I guess it’s part of my powerlifting toolbox, in a way. It’s just another thing that makes up my training. Yeah, so immensely different approach to exercise than it used to be before.
Also in the way that I’ve accepted what I refer to as my “new body,” because when I got my period back, it was like I grew hips. [laughs] My hips got bigger. I looked into it a bit, and apparently it seems to be a common experience. But for me, that was a bit of an adjustment initially because it wasn’t what I was used to seeing. But now with the powerlifting, I just love looking strong. I love the way that – I don’t know, it’s seeing what your body can do.
It’s a really fulfilling thing in that sense, and it’s not about being hyper-muscular either, or being really cut or anything like that. It’s like, wow, this is a powerful machine. Yeah, it’s completely like night and day.
Chris Sandel: I remember – and you can correct me if my memory’s wrong on this, but your transition before you got back into doing lifting was having exercise be play, and just going through a real phase of, as you said, doing handstands or just moving your body in a way like a kid that felt fun again, because for so long, it really hadn’t been like that.
Rachel: Yeah, absolutely. We went through a point at which I really cut back, and when I did start to exercise again, like you say, it was about re-establishing what movement meant to me. For so long, it was very much a mechanical thing about “On this day, I do this. On this day, I do this, and I don’t miss a day.” I was training every day or whatever.
Then it became about, “What do I want to do?” It would be like I’m going to go for a skate. I like to do inline skating, so I would go for a skate, or it would be I’m going to swim in the lake because my friends are going to the lake, I’m going to the lake, we’re going to swim. It’s part of that and not just for the purpose of burning energy. I think that’s when I started to relearn that it’s more about what your body can do.
Then I started to get much more fulfillment out of that movement because it was skills. Like at the moment I can do a 6 or 7-second hold on handstands, to me, that’s much more of an achievement than “today I burned X amount of calories.”
Through those kinds of things, I’ve also built other communities as well. Before, exercise was very much a solitary thing for me, whereas now it’s a means of engagement with people with similar interests. It’s about fun. It’s about being alive. Like I said, with all this energy that I’ve got, it’s really about my community and my interests.
Before, it was something that took up my time, but it felt relentless. Like, really relentless. But now it’s something that takes up my time, but I feel like I’m connected. It’s a totally different way of looking at it. I’m committed, and I like to go to practice because I have a good time, and I feel supported by those people, and I get lots of encouragement. It’s just a totally different perspective.
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Chris Sandel: I know you’ve probably covered some of it throughout your chat, but how has your overall life shifted? What are some of the things that you’re doing now that weren’t achievable before or you weren’t able to do before?
Rachel: I think some of the things maybe I haven’t touched on are I used to be really scared, literally scared, to eat around other people. I think I knew rationally that the way I ate wasn’t – not “not normal,” but it wasn’t sufficient. So I used to avoid lunchtimes with people, dinners with people.
But when I started my PhD, the community of my department and the way that people did things was that they all eat lunch together, so it became really difficult to avoid that. That used to be a massive source of anxiety, and I used to try and bulk out what I was eating with lettuce and stuff, just to make it look as if it was a bigger meal. The thing was, the more I did that, the more people commented on what I was eating, and I used to hate it when people commented on that. It really made me super anxious.
Whereas now, it’s not a problem. The thing is, I’m still a bit of a strange eater, if that’s a way to put it. I have weird combinations of food that I like. So I’ll maybe sometimes have food combinations and people will still pass comments, and I’ll just be like, “That’s my food, this is your food. I don’t care.” [laughs] So that’s something that maybe I hadn’t mentioned.
Even when it comes to my PhD as well, I never used to be able to make it through the day without just feeling utterly exhausted, and now I turn up – people have to come tell me to stop for breaks because I’m just like 100 miles an hour. As a result, I’m really ahead of time with my PhD now. Looks like I might finish early, so I can just take it easy for the moment.
The day ends at 5:00, 5:30, or whatever it is, and I’m like, “Oh, okay, is that the time? Better go home.” I’ve got the energy to think, I’ve got the energy to write and really be present. Like, really be present in my life. I think before, I was like half of me, I would say. It was something my mum commented on when I went to visit back home. She was like, “It’s like the old you. The old you is back.” That was one of the biggest things. I can really give something to what I do in my studies.
We organized a conference here, for example, and I was responsible for recruiting all the volunteers and arranging their work schedule and everything like that. Previously, I would either have not been able to cope just because of the energy factor. I would’ve gotten really anxious about it because there’s lunches involved and there’s coffee breaks involved in that and whatever else, and it’s not routine and I can’t control that situation. Whereas I did it and I was really buzzing and it was a good experience. It was great for networking, and I was really involved in the process and everything like that.
Likewise with my lifting now. Of course, everybody has days where they don’t want to work out and everything, but before, it used to be such a struggle sometimes to get through my workout, whereas now, I can really push myself because I’ve got the energy. Not just the physical energy, but mentally, because I’m so much more content, because obviously I’m eating better. Just mentally, I can cope with those situations better as well.
It sounds really cliché, but I feel like a different person. I feel like I don’t really know that person that was in that place anymore. It feels like I’ve really left that behind. The first time when I initially – because I went into recovery and then I relapsed once, and then I came out and went into recovery again – at that point, I was still holding on to my eating disorder, in a way.
But I genuinely feel like I’ve left it behind now, and I can speak openly about it. It’s not like it comes up in conversation every day, but it might happen talking about something in the past or whatever, and I can say to people, “I had anorexia, I was sick,” or something like that, and it doesn’t define me anymore. It’s not a part of me. It’s a part of my past. I learned from it.
For sure, I think it’s made me a better person in the sense that I appreciate a lot. I really appreciate my health a lot and appreciate the people I have in my life a lot. But it’s just not part of my being anymore at all. And I feel like I’ve really moved on, which is a massive thing, because it took up a pretty big proportion of my life. I think that’s really the most poignant thing for me. This time I feel like I’m done, and I’m not going to relapse. I’m just not going back there.
Chris Sandel: You said you feel like a different person, and I can agree with you on that. Chatting with you now versus chatting with you when we first started, it is a different person. You are just brighter. There was definitely a somberness to you before. You said you laugh easier; I totally agree with that. The difference in your perspective about so many aspects of life is completely different to when we first started.
Rachel: Yeah, absolutely.
00:44:10
Chris Sandel: Part of the reason we’re recording this is because I’m taking on new clients. What would you say to someone who is struggling with what you were dealing with? What advice would you have for them? And I’m not asking for you to give praise; it could be go work with some other practitioner or go do something else. But if someone’s unsure about what is the next step or what they should do, what advice would you give them?
Rachel: If I was talking to myself, I guess, in that time, I would just say that it’s okay to be scared about it. It’s okay to not know the answers, to not know if it’s going to work or not.
But if someone was unsure about asking for help, I would just say just try. Just try, because at the end of the day, if it doesn’t work out, it doesn’t work out, but I think you have more to lose if you don’t give it a shot than if you give it a shot. I know what it feels like to feel stuck. It’s a very cliché thing as well, but if nothing changes, nothing changes.
And accept the fact that you probably won’t like a good part of what you have to do. [laughs] But honestly, if it gets you even 10% close to where I feel right now, then that’s so worth it. It’s worth it for you to give yourself the investment, because at the end of the day, life is very fragile. Just be okay to be scared and be unsure, but just give it a chance.
Chris Sandel: Thank you so much for coming on and for sharing all this. I know we’re talking about fairly personal stuff.
Rachel: Sure.
Chris Sandel: I think it’s been wonderful, you being able to speak so freely and honestly, and as I said, to see the difference between now and where you were when we first started is huge.
Rachel: Yeah.
Chris Sandel: So, thank you.
Rachel: Thanks a lot. It’s been really good to catch up as well. Really good.
Chris Sandel: Awesome.
I hope you enjoyed that conversation with Rachel. I hope it demonstrated the many areas I work on with clients and also what it’s possible to achieve if you want to make a change.
As I mentioned at the top of the show, I’m now taking on clients again. If you’re interested in working together or finding out more, head over to www.seven-health.com/help, and you can read about how I work with clients and apply for a free initial chat.
That’s it for this week’s show. I’ll be back next week, probably with another solo episode, and I will catch you then.
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